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Welcome to MattSiller.com, the blog about my working experiences in Darfur, Sudan. To the right you'll find related links. Blog postings, updated regularly about my experiences are posted below. Enjoy.
January 25, 2006
Blogging is an interesting concept. Blog, the word, is one of those new age techie words like goggle that will eventually find its way into the dictionary. To me, blog as a verb is a release, an insight, an addition. It has become popular for both the writer and reader and you do find blog loyalty and (sometimes mild) obsession on both sides.
From a reader’s standpoint (and I like to read other’s blogs) I think it’s the initial shear curiosity that draws and keeps readers. Then you become interested in following what will happen or be said next. Blogs are like the Real World of Internet, following real personalities.
From a writer, rolling posts out should be easy. But if you set a precedent, writing consistent work with some entertaining value becomes quite the responsibility. Sometimes it’s easy if you use it as an excuse to let the mind release itself on paper. Other times shouldering the responsibility is a heavy burden.
So my approach is this. I’d rather write quality posts than quantity. I have this mindset that I have to keep you both loyal and frequent. Part of me thinks getting you into a reading routine will establish this…ie checking Matt’s blog daily. The other part of me thinks if it’s not quality, then you lose interest. I’m going to go with the ladder and place a precedent to not post unless it attempts to meet somewhere in the spectrum of quality and entertaining.
To me quality means a decently written post of interest in my daily life or of conceptual value. I hear that some prefer only to read about what actually happens to me. And despite the fact I’m living in Africa, I’m not on a daily adventure trekking through deserts and forests running into local tribes and gathering fascinating lore to share. After this mission I might, but now its real work. So I can’t make every post be about me without boring you. (You can’t always want to hear about how I’m now used to fly’s so I dont even bother brushing them away, resulting when I work out of little colonies on my head and body like a hippo or an elephant.)
So what is the purpose of this blog? My main intent is to share my story here in Sudan. That includes dailys and conceptuals and pics. I’d like to provide insight into an area of the world most don’t get to see. So bear with me as posts fluctuate in type. I think overall they will paint an easy reading and interesting picture. (I’d also like to present characters in this story but that is opening a whole new can of worms in my writing style and effect it might have on those here reading.)
In the meantime, let me give you a taste of three upcoming posts.
1. Posts on the view of Darfur from the animals who live here
2. Post discussing the role of democracy and freedom in countries like this, inspired from a Tony Blair quote -
“Is freedom for everyone? – There is a myth that though we love freedom, others don’t; that our attachment to freedom is a product of culture; that freedom, democracy, human rights, the rule of law are American values or western values…Ours are not western values, they are the universal values of the human spirit. And anywhere, any time ordinary people are given the chance to choose, the choice is the same: freedom, not tyranny, democracy, not dictatorship; the rule of law, not the rule of the secret policy. ”
3. Post spinning off the nature of suicide bombers, inspiring from an excerpt below about religious fanatacism written in “The White Nile” by Alan Moorehead.
“Perhaps it is the very austerity of life in these arid wastes that predisposes the people to worship. Mecca lies only a short journey away across the Red Sea, and the Prophet Mohammed himself lived and received his inspirations in just such an environment as this. An immense silence possesses the surrounding desert. The heat is so great it stifles the appetite and induces a feeling of trance-like detachment in which monotony dissolves into a natural timelessness, visions take on the appearance of reality, and asceticism can become a religious object of itself. These are ideal circumstances for fanaticism, and a religious leader can arouse his followers with a devastating effect. All at once the barriers are swept aside, revolt becomes a holy duty, and it can be a shocking and uprooting thing because it makes so sharp a break with the apathy that has gone before. The long silence is broken, the vision is suddenly translated into action, and detachment is replaced by a fierce and violent concentration.”
January 22, 2006
Click on the image to see a handful of pictures taken by our staff around Darfur.
January 21, 2006
Click on the image below to go to my online photo album of Darfur Locals. I can’t claim to have taken all of these photos, unfortunately, because some are really good, but I have taken many and am the caretaker of pictures here on the mission. This is a nice representation of locals around the area.
January 20, 2006
Demonstrations have been taking place over the last couple of days. Recently, the African Union stated they were supporting the United Nations take-over of this mission. Main reason is that they are running out of money (all coming from donor countries). The UN has discussed and agreed it should be done and are awaiting the AU’s blessing to begin logistical planning. The security council meets today to determine exactly what to do. This has angered the Africans.
From a troop standpoint, working for the UN is more desirable because the UN pays better. The UN, despite their snail-like movement in handling numerous logistical and deployment challenges, have been more effective and proven than the African Union in it’s first and largest mission here in Darfur. Even if they were to agree to take over, it would be months before the transition could occur. The locals gathered to rally against this concept.
They don’t like the idea. Maybe they have a bad taste with the UN, ie Congo and elsewhere. Maybe it’s the AU’s concept, Africans helping Africans. (Even though the UN would most likely use African troops here as well). But a protest was staged here in El Fasher to express their anger at this idea.
When protests occur in Muslim countries, they tend to mix themes and be misinformed. America is usually a good scapegoat. Flag burning is a norm. These folks don’t even realize much of the funding for this mission is done by the US. And I think in demonstrations like this, group mentality takes over. Deep down, I hear nothing but positives about us being here. All interaction I’ve had as a white person, Kawaji, with locals has been positive. They cant tell accents or nationalities and I think America to them is this intangible image of a bully. But the international community as a whole supports these locals in so many ways on this mission, I think they are afraid of change and why this protest occured. Evening knowing this, most of these people were probably paid to attend.
This protest was peaceful, ie no intervention by the police. None-the-less, we were kept on movement lockdown. Things are getting interesting as the fate of Darfur teeters.
January 19, 2006
The other day I accompanied the African Union (AU) Force Protection to test fire Armored Personnel Carriers (APC’s). Back in September, Canada donated 105 of these much needed APC’s to the effort to provide a little umph to the mission. With much resistance from the Government of Sudan, all finally arrived. The purpose of this exercise was to train contingencies on how to drive the APC’s and fire the mounted machine guns. It was quite the experience seeing both the APC’s in action and the Africans handling them.
As of late, the rebels on both sides have been attacking the AU convoys between sites. The main intent of the rebels’ attacks are not to kill (although several troops have lost their lives in the ambushes) but rather to take the vehicles and equipment.
These APC’s are to act as a deterrent and intimidation factor against these attacks on the convoys and also to protect the locals.
It was an early awaking as we drove the 30 minutes in sand out to the firing range in mountains east of El Fasher. It was quite a site.
I was driving a Toyota Land Cruiser in the convoy. All of the vehicles out here have a standard transmission, something I only recently taught myself. I was worried not of any attacks on us (a huge convoy of these APC’s is intimidating enough), but more that my inexperience with standard vehicles and lack of sand driving expertise would leave me left in the dust. I was the only ‘civilian’ on this mission and was trying not to stick out like a sore thumb. Fortunately, it went well and was a fun 4WD off-road drive in the desert.
We arrived at the site and the vehicles lined up.
The Government of Sudan troops kept a close eye out on our activities. Remember they are the ones indirectly supporting the Janjaweed attacks on the locals. You can see them pictured above in the upper left and below nearby.
The guys in the desert camo, all former special op’s military personnel, are here as advisors. They did a good job teaching the troops how to use these beasts and their weapons.
January 17, 2006
Mother Mother Ocean, I have heard you call
Wanted to sail upon your waters since I was three feet tall
You’ve see it all, you’ve seen it all.
Watch the wind erode you, switched from sails to steam
In your belly you hold the treasures few have ever seen,
Most of them dream, most of them dream.
Yes I am a pirate, 200 years too late
The cannons don’t thunder there’s nothing to plunder
I’m an over forty victim of fate,
Arriving too late, arriving too late.
I’ve done a bit of smuggling, I’ve run my share of grass
I’ve made enough money to buy Miami
But I’ve wasted away so fast
Never meant to last, never meant to last
And I have been drunk now for over two weeks
I’ve past out and I’ve rallied and I’ve sprung a few leaks
But I’ve got to stop wishing, got to go fishing
Down the rock bottom again,
Just a few friends, just a few friends.
I go for younger woman, live with several awhile
Though I ran up away, they come back one day
Still could manage to smile
Just takes awhile, just takes awhile.
Mother Mother Ocean, After all the years I’ve found
Occupation old hazard be, my occupations just not around
Feel like I’ve drowned, gonna head up to town
I Feel like I’ve drowned, gonna head up to town.
Most excellent lyrics. In the evening I try to let the mind stray…. Tonight drew me toward my favorite song, taking me back to my youth when I used to ride down to the Texas coast listening to Jimmy Buffett tapes the whole way. It brought nostalgia regarding those days and for upcoming trips. The beach is near. Already planning my trip to the Florida Keys on my first break for a little fishing and R&R.
Jimmy Buffett has always served me well overseas. I remember when I was traveling around Russia with a student contingency, we had an evening where we all had to teach eachother songs native to our homeland. While I was waiting to go, I was trying to remember the lyrics to America the Beautiful or Texas our Texas or something patriotic. As the time neared I nixed that idea, instead going with a more fun and (in)appropriate little jingy of Jimmy’s….”Why dont we get drunk and screw”. Immediate hit among the group, vodka (over)flowed, and dare I say the song became the trip theme!?!
Back to Sudan and reality, I finally bottled my brew last night. I’ve worked 15 hours on this batch (biotch). Making this has been is hard. You have to baby it and transfer from container to container. Everything has to be sterile and thats no easy task where I live. To clean out the buckets and wash the bottles, I have to fill the 5 gallon bucket in the shower. I do this by holding it on my head. ( I need a flat top head like the local woman!) More than one bucket full has lost control and toppled down on me. My bottles were gathered in the area and were third world clean. The collection of dust, bugs, and goo had to be triple soaked and scrubbed. Even then, a white calcium, sodium/salt/mineral film lined each bottle from the water. I sterilized as much as possible and bottled using tubes to siphon the beer. It only made for 35 x 12 ounce and 7 x 1/2 liter bottles full before I ran out. I figured the market cost including 15 hours labor, material, demand, and profit would run approximately $10 per 12 ounce serving. All for a beer that has 5.5% alcohol.
The brew is called Northland Ale, hence the dark color, and it’s hoppy but smooth. Tastes a little like Fat Tire. Actually I cant remember what Fat Tire tastes like enough to compare but it sounds right. With the bottling you add sugar which gives it carbonation and takes another 2 weeks (min) for maturity. The uncarbonated beer tasted good enough for me but I’ll let it sit for a bit.
A lot of people are looking to me like I’m the new Brew Master, all wanting their piece of the gold. If it wasn’t such hard work, maybe I would consider the powerful title. I’ll start round two while this batch is maturing. Forget the hassles, it just ‘tastes so good when it hits your lips’.
(Yes, if you look at the picture (double click for a larger image) there are flowers included. Neither are they mine nor real. The local cleaning women leave them in our house and insist on putting them in a jar of water. Dont ask me why…)
January 13, 2006
There’s something synonymous about traveling/exploring in Africa and growing a mustache/beard. The great pioneers of African exploration from Britian and America (David Livingstone, John Speke, Sir Henry Stanley, and Sir Richard Francis Burton) all wore some form of mustache or beard. (Side note: The books written about their unexplored African journeys are fascinating and imaginative, overshadowing much of what is written today about the place…)
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 |
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| Richard Burton |
David Livingstone |
John Speke |
Henry Stanley |
I quickly realized when I arrived that times (or fads, traditions, customs) do not easily change. A rather large percentage folks here have one as well.
And now the one you’ve been waiting for. Why am I living in Africa…to grow a mustache! How could I not!
January 12, 2006
Thinking about living in a place like Sudan conjures up all sorts of images regarding health. I’ve repeatedly heard from the folks and friends: Do you have your shots? Have you been to the doctor? Do you have malaria medicine? Etc etc. The answer to all being yes. So now that I’m here, living in conditions somewhere inbetween city life and the bush, let me shed some light into what happens to your health from my brief experience, chatting with others, and looking at our medical staffs info.
First and foremost, our bodies adjust and if you are normally healthy, then by all means you will acclimatize to a state of normalcy over time. It took me, a person which chronic allergies in certain conditions, one week of hellish runny noses to get used to the dust.
After a week or so of unnatural exhaustion and an extreme hypochondriac reaction to a sore tooth, I realized things generally work themselves out. (I’m one of those people who believe I can think myself out of a sickness after hearing a story of a kid who eliminated terminal cancer by imagining his white blood cells were space ships attacking the cancerous ones.)
Something I couldn’t beat was my contacts so they got ditched. I couldn’t tell if it was my solution or the water or the dust, but every time I made the attempt of “putting the eyes on”, some sort of chemical reaction occurred on my fingers between the water and contact solution resulting in pasty white fingers. Forcing the contact in to my eye caused some serious and painfully unnatural red eye and after about three different combinations of failed insertion, the white flag was waived and glasses it was.
Generally, depending on my mood, I take a malaria pill, a one-a-day vitamin, and a garlic pill, but even this varies. The fake garlic taste is hard to muster but I tend to hold the nose and swallow because they have some intimidating Dracula desert tales I don’t want to face. And it makes you subtly exude a natural mosquito and female repellant, both of which I’m told to avoid round here.
I haven’t had any real problems. Others have. The main health concerns I keep an eye out for are malaria, diarrhea, dehydration, and bites or stings. (Although we only had 14 bites or stings last month in a contingency of almost 10,000. It’s definitely just the fear, not the actuality.) I’m told most people get some form of malaria. There are different levels of intensity and the one to avoid is cerebral malaria, which paralyzes and kills quick. Most of the others just make you feel like an absolute donkey. I’m told take the worst hangover you’ve ever had and multiply it times 100. You can’t move, you ache, fever, etc. It’s no fun. I vary taking my pills b/c some say the pills generally delay the signs and if you get it by the time you see the symptoms it’s bad. Other’s say knocking it away 90% and catching it only 10% of the time is better than having it 5 of 10 times in mild doses.
The nasty one is dysentery or really bad diarrhea, where you become rather powerless. One, you become dehydrated very quickly and this is a rotten effect. Two, grown men have said they never thought the day would come where they couldn’t make it to the toilet. You get that sensation and motorboat as fast as you can to the facilities, but still in utter surprise and disgust, a surprise is running down your legs before you dock. See the effects from afar is quite the site. A mixed smile crosses your face when you look out the window at work and see someone wiggling in a hyper slow motion to the ablution (toilet) facilities, holding his knees and cheeks squeezed as tight as they can, hoping to reach their finish line clean. I knock on wood as I point with my eyes and cant help but chuckle at the silly sight, despite knowing all to well I’ll soon be damned at making his pain my humor. I had another person in my office back slowly out after boldly declaring, “Oops, my hernia just popped, gotta run.” There’s just not a lot of fruit or mixed grains in the diet here and you feel like an Adkins king after awhile… This potty talk paragraph is gross, I know. But it’s real. The truth hurts. You think you know but you have no idea. (To end this paragraph correctly, I had to portray dysentery of the keyboard, spraying a bad pun and cliché all over the place.)
Anyway, I have not seen any visual signs of the HIV yet from folks here and Sudan is not as bad as some of the other nations like South Africa or Nigeria. In fact, the head of the AU mission, a General from Nigeria was highly embarrassed when his country’s battalion of troops got denied entry into Sudan (all troop personnel must test negative for HIV before they enter) when 30% of them tested positive.
But I am not a humanitarian so I don’t track those numbers. Actually read a funny one on www.overheardinnewyork.com the other day.
Guy: Let my put it this way: if a vegetarian eats vegetables, what the hell do you think a humanitarian eats?
Girl: Oh, shut up.
January 11, 2006
I’m telling myself recreating this website is a multiple day job but I just cant stop working on it. Anyway, now that I’m up somewhat, what I’ve been itching to say…bottling up for the last 10 days is…. HOOK EM HORNS!! Wow, it’s about time. Yes I watched the victory after an early 3:30 wake up call on our Satellite DSTV system. I celebrated all day while you all went into the night. It feels good to finally get this one. Vince I’m sad to see you go but it is known you will stick around in our warm and fuzzies about UT football. You have left yourself with quite the Paul Bunyon legend.
My celebrations consisted of getting the local children on board and I must say I taught them well. A monster was created though because I now cant go anywhere without little kids come running up to me waving the longhorn hand sign and smiling. They think it’s a natural greeting, which it should be. So now I am reminded of our great victory daily…every morning, noon and night!
One of the things I missed before the game, but got a good laugh afterwards from the net was the Matthew McConaughey vs Will Ferrell debate. Actually it’s probably more oriented for women with McConaughey’s appeal but it was still funny. You can download it by clicking here.
Yes this is www.mattsiller.com. Sudan – A blog away from home. Sadly – I was feeling above the physics of IT and a good back up. My friend who hosted my site (for free) warned me, “I’m due for a hard drive failure on my server”. I didnt listen. We’ll only partially. I saved my posts. But all the code building the foundation of the site was lost. So I’m back to square one and will be rebuilding furiously at night here. I should be up shortly. In the meantime, I’ve got plenty of posts awaiting. I’ll post the old ones (although I dont think I can backpost). They’ll all be in month January. And I dont have your comments, but you’re welcome to back post those as you so choose, in extreme bordom, obviously. You’ll probably see my work as it develops. No doubt, there should be improvements… Cheers. Thanks for being patient during the down week. I know you’re eagerly awaiting to refill your 10 minutes a day the siller way…
